Because Matthew Domville is Worth Talking About

2008-01-28T20:14:00.001-05:00

I thought I'd try to post quickly using my new iTouch. Fancy that. It's pretty nifty, but I wish I had a neighbour with WiFi.

2008-01-24T19:26:00.000-05:00

Oy!

I noticed that some time has passed since my last post, so I figured I'd type down a little something-something. I'm not sure if I'm allowed to say I have a blog if I only use it bi-annually.

(Exactly) Four months ago I got a job with TV Media Inc in Orleans. I am a TV Listings Editor, which sounds pretty darned impressive. I write up TV listings for various publications (as you might have guessed), and I have my own little cubicle/computer/bulletin board. I'm living the office job dream I never knew I had.

Anyhoo. Around the time I got the job, I moved in with my Significant Other. This has been an excellent experience overall (but, like most excellent things, not without its challenges). I have returned to my habit of overusing brackets. Ah well.

Theatre-wise, I've been inactive. I haven't auditioned, written or directed anything since my Parks Canada job over the summer. The TV Media thing has been eating up most of my energy.

Actually, technically I wrote "something", but it was more in the roleplaying camp than the theatre camp, so I don't count that.

My birthday is coming up on the 26th, vast audience that reads this. I'll be turning 25, so don't forget to buy me a card.

Matthew

2007-06-24T09:47:00.000-04:00

WHY IS RAY BESHRAH ON THE FLOOR?

BECAUSE HE JUST FOUND OUT THAT "BOOKWORM" WON "BEST IN VENUE"

Woot!

This means there is a BONUS SHOW on Sunday, September 24th at 9:30PM at Arts Court Theatre. Come see the show everybody's talkin' about.

2007-06-16T10:24:00.000-04:00

OPENING NIGHT WAS A BLAST!

Look at these two happy actors. They are still thrilled about our reception for "Bookworm" (at Arts Court Theatre, 2 Daly Avenue) on Opening Night. Even though it was at 11PM, we still had a fantastic audience that was really responsive. Thanks to everyone that came! Tell your friends! Perhaps pork products and footgear should be mentioned... but keep that on the downlow.

2007-06-09T07:49:00.000-04:00

YOU'RE STARS, EVERY ONE OF YA

Here's another publicity picture from Garkin Productions's "Bookworm". Here we see the unflappable duo of Ray Besharah and Amanda Klaman as Al and Lorrie.

2007-06-04T20:43:00.000-04:00

HOW CAN YOU SAY "NO" TO THESE FACES?

Heya!

Here's a tasty preview shot from "Bookworm", premiering at the Ottawa Fringe Festival

I'm writing and directing it, and it stars Ray Besharah and Amanda Klaman.
Amanda's currently in the Ottawa Stilt Union production of "Beowulf" and Ray can be seen mostly naked doing Eddie May Murder Mysteries.

The show is a comedy and it's got a good chunk of schtick, so be sure and check it out.

2007-05-19T11:10:00.000-04:00

UPDATE VOID

There has been a lack of updates, as of late. A million apologies.

First, the promised, though somewhat shortened, account of the "Colbert" taping. The first part, where he does rapid fire jokes about the evening's topics ("TONIGHT...") was very amusing, especially since he seemed to be on the verge of collapse as he spoke. The WORD was also excellent. As a couple of points during the taping, he lost his place on the prompter, causing him to sheepishly admit "I fucked up...". Then he conferred with the stage manager, figuring out where he should restart taping. Things were apparently going fine until "the pills started kicking in". When the audience laughed at that joke, he said "Don't humour me! I'm not humouring you! It's tit for tat!". They decided to take the taping from a camera switch, during which time he was taping his papers on the desk. It's funny because he was cracking up at they started taping again, so I can only assume that the broadcasted show had Stephen delivering a story, changing cameras, then suddenly and for no reason cracking up. I should have downloaded it to see what it looked like.

One of the main stories was a Sport Report (remember, that's pronouned "Spore Repore) on the subject of College Basketball. Apparently that's what Americans mean when they say "March Madness". I honestly had no idea up until this point. Despite my unfamiliarity, it was pretty darned funny. Such is the power of Colbert.

The interview was with a mountain climber. In keeping with the theme, Stephen "climbed" his way to the interview area. Besides the interview itself, I can't really dish any dirt. I can tell you that the stage manager guy has little cards that tell Stephen how much time he has left, so consider the lid of that bombshell to be blown off.

At the end of the show, Stephen thanked us for coming and we were herded back into the hard streets of NYC. On the way out, I tried to roll my twenty-sider on "The Desk:, but one of the security guards stopped me. Fair enough. I wouldn't want polyhedron marks on my desk if the situation were reversed.

Now, it is May, and I have returned to working at Parks Canada. We've got some new members of "The Maple Sugar Gang" and they are all of a friendly sort.

Also, I'm writing and directing a Fringe play for Garkin Productions called "Bookworm". The show features Amanda Klaman and Ray Besharah and it will be at Arts Court (the good venue, not the Library... UNNECESSARY BURN on the Library).

It's a comedy and it's funny. Everything I ever wanted from a show. There will be tasty updates on the rehearsal process as things move forward. I think I'll bring my camera to today's rehearsal, so maybe I'll put some pictures up here.

Other news: I didn't get cast in "She Stoops to Conquer", but lots of cool cats did. This includes Eddie May buddy Zach Counsil, all-around cool guy Scott Goldman and Ottawa treasure Paul Rainville. Third Wall has also announced their new season. They've got "Top Girls", "Empire Builders" and "Tartuffe" on the chopping block. I'm not the world's biggest Churchill fan, so I'll probably give "Top Girls" a miss. "Empire Builders" will be directed by Joel Beddows, so I will definitely see that one. "Tartuffe" is being translated by David Whiteley and directed by James Richardson. Good combo.

2007-03-26T19:13:00.000-04:00

At this point, we were pretty "warmed up". They kept delaying his arrival until the last second, when we had almost exhausted our "woo!" supply. But when he came running out, our "woo"s reappeared. There was great applause as Dr. Stephen T. Colbert D.F.A. AKA Myron Reducto AKA Phil Ken Sebben AKA Prof. Impossible AKA Chuck Noblet AKA Stephen Colbert entered the room. He immediately got to the Q_A, asking if we had anything to ask him before he went on to say horrible things.

The first question-poser asked him to appear as a guest speaker for some kind of teacher's convention. He asked where it was, she responded "Fort Worth, Texas" and he immediately said "Noooooo...." He seemed reluctant to put the show on pause in order to attend (understandibly) and I doubt the red state thing helped much.

I didn't hear the second question, but some aspect of it reminded Stephen of a song, of which he sang a few bars. It sounded like some kind of country song, but I wasn't familiar with it. Whatever it was, he did a good job. He's got some decent pipes on him.

The third question was from a nervous young woman who prefaced her question with "This is a really nerdy question, but..." We'll see about that, Brent and I seemed to vow. She went on to first ask what he was reading these days. I think he responded with "Franny and Zooey" by Salinger. He really seemed to love this book, so I might have to check it out. The young woman concluded by asking to shake Stephen's hand, which he did, warmly and without ceremony, saying that it was nice to meet her.

I believe that I was the fourth person to ask a question. While I believe I did the actual asking, for the record let it be known that the question was a combination of the efforts of Brent Hirose, and we both stood up while the question was asked. Stephen pointed slightly to the right of me, which made me think he was choosing someone else, so there was an initial moment of confusion. Eventually, however, I managed to ask: "Stephen, my friend and I understand that you used to play Dungeons and Dragons. We would therefore like to know the best way to roll a natural twenty on a twenty-sided die." He responded immediately with the Answer, which Brent and I promised to keep secret, then said:

"Did you guys have that thing where if you roll double zero, you get to roll again to see if you do more damage?"

We responded, sure, that's a critical hit.

"Right! I once had an 18th level paladin get killed by a goblin because of a critical hit."

We expressed sympathy, of course.

"You know, I met Gary Gygax," he boasted.

We looked briefly jealous and he scornfully stated: "Deal with it!"

He then apologized to the rest of the audience for this little tangent, certain that very few of them would understand what he was talking about.

Then he said "I was at GenCon 10! I took part in the very first aerial combat rules for Dungeons and Dragons!"

After this, he managed to tear himself away from the subject and move on to the next topic.

I was reeling at this point, as I'm sure Brent was. It felt like we were just in a segment on the Colbert Report, on a topic of our own choosing. This little encounter really "made" my trip to New York and has left me feeling pretty good since.

A little bonus note: After the questions finished up, Stephen took his place at The Desk. Here, he performed a few warm-up moves, like slicking back his hair, lining up his eyebrows, that kind of thing. The last move he pulled, however, was miming rolling a die, then acting very pleased with the result. He then pointed to Brent and I as we cheered. Good times.

Next post, I'll tell you what the actual show was like.

2007-03-21T14:12:00.000-04:00

I have returned to the north side of the border. The trip took all night, and I was supposed to keep the driver, Ray, awake. I think I drifted off a couple of times, but I was mostly paying attention to the Robert Ludlum novel that was playing on the stereo. Anyway, back to the Colbert thing.

We waited for a while, and eventually it became clear that there was a group of five people in the regular line who were having a problem. The person for whom the reservation was under wasn't there yet. They were taken out of the regular line and told that they would be put back once reservation-guy showed up. Time started ticking, and it became clear that if reservation-guy didn't show up, Brent and I would be let in (with another three people from the stand-by line). They tried calling him, and kept insisting that he hurry. The guy with the slipboard finally asked us for our ID and we were in the regular line. Interestingly, the five kept calling reservation-guy, telling him to hurry up or they wouldn't be let in. I guess the Colbert people didn't tell them it was a lost cause.

There was a metal-detector, so we had to get all of our metal ready. I actually had a crapload of change (after buying stamps from a machine and getting 17 American loonies. I'm calling these Sacajaweyas, but maybe that's not what they're called. I hate that the Americans haven't taken to using these things more regularly. One dollar bills are ridiculous). We went through the metal detector and stood around like anxious cattle in a small waiting area. We were slowly let into the Colbert set. We were among the last in.

We stepped trhough the large double doors into the holy land. The big "C"-shaped desk stood proudly. The wall of mementos, including pictures of House, M.D. and Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots. The most striking item was a recently-acquired vibranium relic. Stephen had just been bequeathed Steve Rogers's most precious item: Captain America's shield. We made our way to the right side of the audience, providing us with a fine view of the interview area, but a so-so view of the desk. I sat on the stairs and Brent sat in the last of the chairs. I didn't mind, though I felt pretty short.

A stand-up comic came out to warm us all up. He was pretty darned funny, especially considering the largely-improvised nature of his material, commenting on members of the audience and asking questions. He also told us about a couple of Colbert moments during previous Q+As. One time, a black member of the audience stood up and asked him "Are you my daddy?", to which he immediately responded "Khareem?". Funny stuff. We also got to see the Eagle's Nest, where Stephen Jr. will be staying should he ever wish to return from British Columbia (though why anyone would want to leave Canada is beyond me).

Finally, the man himself appeared. More on that in my next post.

2007-03-17T12:15:00.000-04:00

The Big Cheesecake

This is my first international post. I'm currently in New York City. I arrived more than a week ago, to perform in the Frigid Festival. Our show, "G-Men Defectives", is doing fairly well. We received a positive review over at nytheatre.com, so be sure to check that out.

My adventures in New York have been pretty awesome. I checked out Times Square about a dozen times. There, I saw a musical called "Avenue Q". Pretty darned skippy. Lots of puppets cussing up a storm. Ray and I also checked out Central Park, walking through some of the paths and checking out the huge bronze statues of literary figures. We also saw the perimeter of the Central Park Zoo (where seals were visable), but we didn't pay to check out the good stuff. I saw the outside of the Met, but was told that since it's Monday, it's closed. Obviously Monday equals closed.

I also checked out the flagship Macy's store, which was pretty boring for me, but I'm sure would have been interesting for someone who enjoyed shopping for clothes and perfume. I visited Midtown comics, where I tried to achieve my dream of meeting Spider-Man, but all I found was a statue. I visited Rockefeller Center(er), but didn't bump into Tina Fey. No Christopher Walken in sight, either.

Having failed to meet my heroes, I was hesitant when it was suggested that we try to get stand-by tickets for "The Colbert Report". Our group, including Ray and my new buddies Brent and Anne, arrived at the Colbert Report building around 2:45PM. We had the first spot in the stand-by line, so we amused ourselves by discussing comics and playing "This One Time" (a new game we invented, where you think of an actor, then shares memories of movies you've been in. The next player shares another memory until you run out of movies). We also talked about Omega Flight, the new Canadian Marvel superteam that contains a very small number of Canadians and, for some reason, Beta Ray Bill. Anyway, the stand-by ticket line became longer as time went on. Eventually we realized that only some of us might get in, so we decided to use my recently-purchased twenty sided die to determine the order of entry. I think I came in second-land, so I may need to give my new die a cleansing. When the time came, we were informed that no stand-by tickets would be given out, but we were thanked for our time. I got a little quiet. Not quite sulky, but quiet.
The next day, Brent and I resolved to get in. We waited in line, again very early and again first in line. Brent decided to forecast our chances with a die-roll, tossing off a natural twenty on Fifty Fourth street. The waiting game began again. We saw the regular ticket-holder line become longer and longer. A group of regular ticket holders from Pennsylvania chatted us up for a while (one wearing a "Bears: Number One Threat to America" t-shirt. They sympathized with our failure yesterday and wished us luck.
But was luck truly on our side...? Find out on my next post.

2007-03-01T19:13:00.000-05:00

Eighth is Enough

Hello... I'm getting ready to settle down with a fine bottle of Coke Zero. I had been told that there would be no new "30 Rock" tonight, but apparently I was in error. There's some good stuff happenin' on the TV and I don't want to miss it.

There was a really good episode (funny, too) of "Lost" last night, so I'll try to post a summary when I get a chance. I've been spending some time getting ready for my Third Wall audition. By "getting ready", I mean reading the script out loud a few times, trying to get a feel for the language. I thought about having a section prepared to perform, but since I wouldn't be able to dedicate the time I would to a standard monologue, I feel this would create higher expectations than I would like.

I have recently determined that I am probably eighth choice for most male roles in Ottawa. I don't know if people who know my work would consider the number eight to be egotistical or modest, but I think it's accurate. This positioning is based on a neutral, age-appropriate, "physical characteristics are unimportant" assumption. If they need a hairy guy or a tall guy, I move up a few notches, if they need a bodybuilder or a dancer I move down a few notches. As I may have posted previously, they're doing it gender-blind, so that can either work to my advantage or against it. On one hand, I might have a shot at an inginue role (which would, naturally, be a first) or maybe a sassy matron. On the other hand, the hoards of very fine Ottawa female actors (like some of my very favourites; your Lorettos, your MacDonalds, etc) would have a shot at the roles I would be typically be going for. Mixed bag, baby.

New York is shaping up nicely. I'm definitely planning to check out the Rockerfeller Center (or, as we call it in Canada: "Rockrefellre Centre"). Ray and I are adding a little spice to our show, to make sure it has the metropolitan edge it needs for the Big Apple. Ray's having a little "See Ya Suckers" Soiree to mark our departure. If you found this blog and want to come, I'm sure we can arrange an invite.

On another, more awesome note: My lady and I are celebrating our 39th Monthiversary. She's far away in Africa, but I still wish her much success and love (and frog-repelling energy).

2007-02-25T14:20:00.000-05:00

Zzzzz

Heya Hoya. I didn't get much sleep last night. I'm not sure why. i think some part of my body has decided that thew new cue for sleepy-time is the rising sun. This doesn't really work for me, as I usually have plans during the day, and scheduling plans for 3Am is something of a hassle.

I spent most of yesterday working on a show for Parks Canada. We were missing a couple of actors, so I needed to do my Colonel By scene with our commander-in-chief, John Muggleton. This event was more than just a scene, though. We were attending a 1830s theme night, and we were part of the entertainment. I wound up getting asked many questions about the construction of the Rideau Canal, perhaps half of which I answered correctly. There was also food, though, so that was a very fine motivator. Overall, we did a good job, I believe.

On Thursday, there was an excellent episode of "The Office" entitled "Cocktails". This one was directed by J.J. Abrams, the guy who was responsible for "Alias" and co-created "Lost". I thought it was one of the better episodes of the season.

The main plot concerns a soiree being held by the CFO of Dunder-Mifflin. Michael is excited about it, because he and Jan have decided to go public with their relationship. Jim is going with Karen, but really really doesn't want to go. "I don't like to discuss paper outside of work (mumbles) or at work". Dwight is riding along with Michael.

The "B" story concerns the rest of the office-mates, who are meeting up in a bar. Pam has decided to become more assertive, so when Roy says that he wants to get hammered with his brother instead, she puts her foot down. She also says "I'm going to start telling people what I want, directly. So, look out, world, 'cause... old Pammy is getting what she wants. And... don't call me "Pammy!" At the bar, it's revealed that Kevin has set a date with his lady, but when pressed for details he testily says "It's complicated, and I would appreciate some space on this." Annoyed Kevin is funny. After Pam mentions how cute it is, Toby spends much of the evening trying to win a stuffed animal from a claw machine.

Outside the party, Jan has the following to say to the camera: "I am taking a calculated risk. What’s the upside, I overcome my nausea, fall deeply in love, babies, normalcy, no more self-loathing. Downside, I, uh date Michael Scott publicly, and collapse in on myself like a dying star. Why is this so hard?....That’s what she said. Oh my god. What am I saying?"

At the party, Michael is, true to form, making an ass of himself. He uses every opportunity to mention that he and Jan are "lovers", to the point of making everyone uncomfortable. Karen is making Jim uncomfortable by pointing out the various people in the party with whom she had a previous relationship. Finally, Dwight is making everyone uncomfortable by asking questions about the house (square footage, construction, value, etc), eventually deciding to investigate for himself. At one point, the scene shows him waiting on a chair as a child wakes up in his bed. As soon as the kid's awake, Dwight starts asking more questions about the house. When the kids says "I don't know" too many times, Dwight derisively comments "What "do" you know?"
After one too many of Michael's awkward conversations, Jan excuses them away from the others, apparently to chastise him. She then, surprsiingly, starts making out with him, against his complaints. She wants him to slam her against a wall, but he resists repeatedly. When he says "You're acting inappropriately", she becomes frustrated and leaves.

At the bar, Pam has decided to clear the air with Roy. She decides that if the relationship is going to get a fresh start, she needs to tell him about the Jim-kiss. After everyone else has left, she tells him about it. He goes ballistic, yelling at her, then throwing his drink at the bar mirror. This part was pretty shocking. He and his brother start tearing up the bar while Pam quickly leaves and says "This is over."

At the party, Michael is frightened of Jan, Jim finds out he has been pranked by Karen (she hasn't been in relationships with any of these people) and Dwight concludes that the house is sound, and thus it was a good party. The trip home in Michael's car is similar to the cliche of parents making up after a fight at a party, with Dwight playing the child's role, Jan playing the
apologetic father, and Michael playing the slighted mother. It was actually a pretty good scene.

The quick scene after the credits had Roy declaring to his brother that he was going to kill Jim Halpert. Nice little cliffhanger there.

2007-02-20T22:28:00.000-05:00

Nothing of Note

Not much happening this week. I'm trying to work on some Fringe ideas. Ray and I should be putting up something special come June. I'm also very psyched about our "International Tour", which is our fancy way of saying we're going to New York and coming back. We've added some stuff to the show, so if you liked it in Ottawa, you should see it again in the States and enjoy the following extra material:

5 minutes of bonus footage
Cast commentary
Gag reel

Not bad, eh? I found out that Third Wall is having auditions for "She Stoops to Conquer". I'm a fan of the script, the director (Todd Duckworth) and the company (Third Wall), so I'm definitely going to give it a shot. Apparently they're casting gender-blind, so it should be an interesting show, at any rate. Anyway, tonight I played a little poker at my brother's house. I came in second, but I learned a little bit about how to play the game effectively.

2007-02-18T00:05:00.000-05:00

A Special Get Well Soon

Don't be sick, Spoon. Heal up!

2007-02-17T22:09:00.000-05:00

This Post is Short

I spent today doing a little work with my mom and my bro. The actual work was pretty short and easy; move furniture x into room y without hitting wall z. Simple enough. Afterwards, there was Boston Pizza, which I always enjoy.

I am in a "missing my lady" place right now, but hopefully this will pass.

2007-02-15T22:39:00.000-05:00

Frickin' Cold

It's cold outside. Very very cold. I tried to do a little shopping today, but the cold made things very difficult. Travelling to the store was alright, because I could keep my hands in my pockets. On the way back, though, I had bags to carry. I had to do the alternating pockets thing, but it was for naught. The point is, cold is bad, but hot is worse.

I bought some swimming trunks at Giant Tiger recently. Suffice to say, they didn't really work out. While they technically fit, it was impossible to move one's legs properly. Maybe I'll post a picture of the ridiculousness of this garment.

"The Office" was directed by Joss Whedon tonight. It was one of the better episodes of the season. Essentially, a few things are happening:

* A bat has been discovered in the office. Jim and Karen pretend that Jim is turning into a vampire in front of Dwight. Dwight and Creed, meanwhile, have formed a bat-strike team.
* Michael has been asked to speak in front of Ryan's business class. Ryan has reported to the class that Dunder Mifflin is a struggling business, and is likely to die out within ten years.
* Pam is having work featured at an art show, and is hoping for as much support as possible.

The bat plot is mainly played for physical laughs. Kelly and Meredith get the worst of it, the latter having her head trapped in a garbage bag ALONG WITH THE BAT. Freaked her out quite a bit. Jim and Karen doing little "vampire revelation scenes" was also excellent ("That bread is WHITE HOT", "No Jim, this garlic bread is cool").
Michael is eager to embrace is role as teacher. He brings props, a soundtrack, but unfortunately no useful information. The questions take on a darker edge, peppering Michael with realistic talk of paper becoming obsolete. Michael defends his business, but stiffens up when it is revealed that Ryan believes that the business is dying, as well. On the ride home, Michael tells Ryan to clean out his office.
Pam’s show: Roy comes, bringing his brother with him. He tactlessly points out (eager to make himself look good) that no one from work came. Eventually, he leaves with his brother. He points out, however, that he looked at everything, and that Pam’s “art was the most beautiful art there.” Later, she overhears Oscar’s boyfriend insulting her work, calling it “department store art.” She’s not feeling great.

Ryan is trying to apologize, but Michael is having none of it. He asks Michael to reconsider firing him, but Michael clarifies that he’s “in the people business, (he) doesn’t fire people, (he) hires people.” Ryan is moving to a desk near Accounting, next to Kelly.
Pam is wandering the art show sadly, about to take down her work. Soon, Michael bursts in, apologizing for being late. He compliments Pam’s work, taking particular notice of a picture of the outside of the Dunder Mifflin offices. He immediately offers to buy it, declaring without typical Scott theatricality that he wants to hang it in the office. Pam hugs him immediately.

The last scene involved Michael hanging the picture in the office. He says that it’s important, timeless and excellent, and that it wouldn’t exist without paper.

The epilogue consists of Kelly being hyperactive and thrilled that Ryan is working next to her, further affirming that Michael may be smarter than he lets on.

2007-02-14T13:55:00.000-05:00

St-Valentine's Day!

Just a quick message to say that I love my spoon.
This ice sculpture contains both a heart and penguins, thus it symbolizes our love (though our love has a longer life expectancy than the sculpture).

2007-02-12T23:46:00.000-05:00

The More TV I Watch, The Angrier I Get

OK, first off: "Norbit" is at the top of the North American box office. Eddie Murphy goes back to the fat-suit well. I'm sorry, I meant "Academy Award Nominee" Eddie Murphy. My bad. Speaking of which, the Oscars are coming up on February the 25th. I'll be continuing my annual tradition of visiting a couple of fine friends of mine (and their daughter and dog) . I will predict the winners incorrectly, as I always do (save for last year's "Crash" upset).

Annoying television sexism: "A recent study has shown that the thoughts of the male brain are divided as follows: 50% Beer, 49$ Professional Wrestling and 1% Remembering Valentine's Day."

Hoo Boy! They sure have my gender pegged! There's nothing I like better than a cold brewski while I watch WWE on February 14th. Good times, good times. All thanks to my Y chromosome.

2007-02-12T18:43:00.000-05:00

The Penguin Theme Continued

I spent some time today checking out the Winterlude sights. Unfortunately, the weather was a little nippier than I like, so I didn't spend very long outtside. I took some pictures of the more interesting ice sculptures. The constnat yearly appearance of mermaids confuses me. The winter/cold/Canada theme makes sense, but why the heck is there always at least one mermaid ice sculpture? I think this reveals volumes about the cultural impact Starbucks has had on us.

Ottawa Fringe 2007 is still in the planning stages. My contribution is going to be something special, I assure you.

2007-02-11T17:44:00.000-05:00

Why on Earth Would I Choose to Watch This?

"According to Jim" is on TV right now. I may have found the only thing on TV more offensive and repugnant than reality television. Cliche and sexism are found in abundance. Some fun facts from today's episode of "According to Jim":
Women like: Dresses, patterns and dining sets.
Men like: "The game", conspiring against their wives, etc.
In today's episode, Courtney Thorne-Smith promises her wedding dress to a friend of the couple's that is getting married. She doesn't know, however, that the dress was destroyed fifteen years ago when Jim forgot to get it preserved (it perished in a fire). The whole episode is about fat Jim and his fatter friend (presumably to make Jim seem less fat) tricking the two women into fighting, so that the new bride won't want Courtney's old dress.
The worst part is, Jim gets away with it! He freaking destroyed something that meant a lot to Courtney, lied about it, then pretended to care so much about the dress that he couldn't let someone other than Courtney wear it. I don't even think this was supposed to be ironic or satirical. I think the viewer is actually expected to side with Jim...
I'm getting sick of the pendulum swinging back on lead male roles on family sitcoms. The father figure used to be competant, wise and in charge. Naturally, this was a stereotype, but it represented the times. Now, we've gone too far in the other direction. Your Homer Simpsons, your Ray Barones, etc. Lame. Our patriarchs are idiots, to compensate for perpetuating the housewife idea on the other side of the gender border.

Anyhoo. Eventually I'll defeat sexism.

I had a tasty brunch with my lady-friend's family today. I intended to take some pictures, so I cleverly charged my battery, then left it in the charger when I headed out.

2007-02-10T23:24:00.000-05:00

The Meat-Cutting is Supervised by an Outside Agent

I enjoyed a tasty meal made by my brother (fajitas!) and arranged by my mom. She was busy painting her room and my brother was watching the Montreal/Ottawa hockey game. He, a diehard Habs fan, was disappointed with the results (5 to 3 Ottawa, as I recall). In the above picture, he's carefully cutting the meat for our meal. Hooper, meanwhile, is searching for an opportunity (which, sadly, never presented itself).

2007-02-09T15:57:00.000-05:00

I Watched Me Some Tee Vee

Alright. I got to see some pretty excellent television recently, so I thought I'd recap a little of it for you. First, "Lost", which I had to download (actually, my roommate downloaded it, then gave it to me) because I was running my D+D game.

The episode starts with Juliet on the beach. She goes inside, passes Ethan Rom, then enters a room with a woman on a bed. It is established that they are sisters, and that Juliet is giving her injections, though both are worried that "he" will find out about them. Juliet then opens the window, revealing that they are in Miami (not on THE ISLAND).

Back to the present. Jack is holding Ben's kidneys captive in order to secure Kate and Sawyer's release. Juliet seems uninterested in this crap, and decides to call Jack's bluff by ordering the captives brought in. Switch to Kate and Sawyer, who have managed to overpower their captors. Sawyer decides to headbutt one of them into the electronic food button repeatedly, giving him a nice shock. Very effective and amusing. On the run, they encounter Alex (Rousseau's kid) who tells them she has a boat but will require their help in rescuing her boyfriend, Carl. There's always a catch, isn't there?

Flashbacks again: Juliet is stealing something from the fertility research company she works for. Extra awkward is the fact that her boss is her ex-husband (and he's seeing some new chick, who managed to sleep her way into a research position), plus he's an ass. He finds out about her experiments with her sister (which are related to fertility, unsurprisingly) and leans on her to hook him up with the credit/profits. Later, she is approached by a smooth-talking representative of a Portland research facility (at which point it is revealed that she successfully managed to impregnate a male mouse, though it didn't carry to term). He's very eager to have her sign up, but she knows she can't leave her ex-husband's employ. "Is there any way?", he presses, but she tearfully explains the only way would be if he was hit by a bus. "By a bus", she said, foreshadowingly.

Back in the ER (the one on the show, not the drama series that just won't die on NBC), Ben has woken up. Apparently, Jack's not so good with the anaesthetics. He requests a private moment with Juliet, which Jack grants begrudgingly. After this private moment, Juliet is all-too-eager to help Kate and Sawyer escape.

Speakin' a which. Kate, Sawyer and Alex have to pull a Star Wars wookie-prisoner trick (and, to their credit, they cite their sources) to rescue Carl from the oft-referenced scene in Clockwork Orange. You know, the chair that pulls open your eyes, then they show weird movies... That whole schtick. One of the henchmen catches up with them later, eager to get some killin' in. But he's shot down by Juliet, who allows everyone but Alex to leave. This last part is because Alex's father, Ben (BIG REVEAL), would never allow her to go.

In flashback land, Juliet finds out that her sister is pregnant, making her experiment successful (I was expected a "her sister's a dude" twist at the end, but it never came to be). She tells this news to ex-husband-ass (oh, look a bus in the distance) who is thrilled by the implications (do I hear a bus?) but still wants his cut. Then he gets hit by a bus. He's dead, and in the morgue, no less, Juliet is re-approached by Portland guy, this time with Ethan Rom in tow. Despite her misgivings ("But I said I wanted him to get hit by a bus..." "Did you? I didn't even hear that..."), she agrees to take the job. At this point, it is revealed that the job is "Not in Portland" (hence the title).

Jack finishes up with Ben, takin' care of that nasty ol' tumour. Afterwards, he asks what Ben told her that convinced her to help him. Tearfully, he confesses that if she helped, Ben would let her go home.

Which I thought was a good ending.

2007-02-08T21:54:00.000-05:00

Brief post: I was just watching one of my favourite TV shows, "30 Rock", and Rachel Dratch's character this episode (she plays a new one every second episode or so) kept saying "Happy Valentime's".
Tina Fey understands how wretched this mispronunciation is.

2007-02-08T17:39:00.000-05:00

The Lemonade Goes on a Trip

How do? I spent last night running my Dungeons and Dragons game. The heroes were sent by a whiny teenager to deliver a love letter to a mysterious singer in the nearby swamp. The heroes begrudgingly accepted this assignment, and therein lay the fun.

Immediately after the game, I had a short shift at Shopper's Drug Mart. It was simple enough. There was no new product, so our job was to bring stuff from the back of the store to the front of the store. Not exactly rocket science. The only downside was the very long walk through wind and snow that occured after the shift. Damn the bus. Damn it.

Today, I was planning to do some laundry and clean up my room a bit, but I got a call from Blockbuster. Apprently, I returned "24" to the wrong Blockbuster location. They asked that I pick it up and bring it to the correct location, otherwise they would have to charge me a hundred and ten dollars for the series. It's at times like these that I realize how completely the public transit system has failed us. It took me over three hours and four bus tickets to get to one Blockbuster, pick up the DVDs, make my way to another Blockbuster, then come home. This made me a sad panda. And again I curse the Bus Gods.

Yesterday, I purchased a 12-pack of sparkling lemonade for 99 cents at the Loblaws (this purchase was alluded to in yesterday's title), and now one of the cans is posing in front of the cemetary that flanked one of the many bus stops of today's trip.

2007-02-07T16:04:00.000-05:00

This Lemonade Was a Real Bargain

Here I am again, typing away like a monkey. I had a chance to converse with my lady through an instant messenger program. This was a welcome relief, but my attempts to call her have met with failure (busy signal, fooey). She's dealing with a crapload of problems, both environmental and biological, so I wish her strength and endurance.

Aside from the convo with my African princess, I spent today performing various chores. Among these included picking up some food. This food was slightly healthier than my usual fare, including whole wheat bread and bananas. The bananas were the closest thing to dessert I bought, as well, so kudos to me for avoiding the ever-tempting oatmeal-raisin cookies. How I wish I was eating one now... Yum. I also entered a contest for a free movie-and-dinner thing on Valentine's Day. If I win, I'm taking my stuffed penguin (mentioned previously) on a night on the town and sending the pictures to Tanzania. Finally, I returned the third season of "24" to my local Blockbuster (which is actually a lengthy bus ride away).

2007-02-06T22:16:00.000-05:00

Matthew is Not Healthy

Last night I worked at Shopper's Drug Mart. It was an alright shift, many products were placed in neat little rows on shelves. My brother, Marc, and our mutual friend, Mark, were there as well. I started talking about diet, which lead to them suggesting I work out if I wanted to get healthy. This makes obvious sense, until you realize that I'm a very lazy person. Therein lies the problem. Anyway. Today, I tried to take them up on their offer. They live in a townhouse, the basement of which contains a few pieces of exercise equipment. I needed to borrow some shorts from my brother, simply because my wardrobe is... streamlined. If Goldfinger ever irradiated the black denim equivalent of Fort Knox, then the value of my dresser's contents would skyrocket. I tired the eliptical machine at first, which was something I could get into. A little TV, a little eliptical. Not too shabby. I could "not" get into weights. Weights are terrible things that remind me that I have the back of an eighty-year old man and the arms of Jughead Jones. I decided to part with the weights and get back to the eliptical, although over time, the eliptical became less appealing.

The funny part is, I spent all that time attempting to work out, and the part of my body that is most sore is the arm I used to hold the "Wii" remote when I played Nintendo Tennis later that afternoon (which, by the way, is awesome). During the workout, we watched "Baseketball", which I vaguely remember watching in theatres. This time around, however, I noticed Greg Grunberg in a small role. You go, Greg Grunberg. You go.

I'm expecting a call from my Africanized honeybee (Can "you" think of a cuter nickname? Didn't think so) sometime soon. That should be a very fine treat.

2007-02-05T11:26:00.000-05:00

Monday, Muddy Monday

Here we are at the beginning of the week. On the chopping block today is a meeting with Ray regarding our crazy New York experience. I am not sure of my preparedness for this meeting, as I have been without funny thoughts for some days now, as evidenced by my recent posts.

I spent the weekend playing "Expedition to Castle Ravenloft" which was fun and hard. I played a dwarf cleric of the sun, which turned out to be very useful against the legions of undead we faced. Our Dungeon Master did paper cut-outs for the entire final location, which was a huge multi-layered castle. In the end, there was much pain, and even a death or two. Yesterday, we ran from 8AM to midnight, which is probably the longest session I remember ever taking part in (not counting conventions, because sleep is banished from such places). Good weekend, tasty adventure.

I saw "Pan's Labyrinth" recently, which is as good as the hype. The hype is that it's a very good film, by the way. It's very engaging, and imaginative from a visual perspective. The imagination/reality relationship is played up expertly. I strongly recommend it. One thing that irritated me, though, is on the imdb.com page for the film, it has an example of an increasingly annoying trend that I've noticed: "Received 22 minutes of applause at the Cannes Film Festival". I'm just getting sick of these increasing figures of duration of applause at the freakin' Cannes Film Festival. "Fahrenheit 911" got ten minutes of applause, "The Queen" got an eighteen minute standing ovation, at the end of "Babel" the entire audience died of orgasmic pleasure... blah blah blah.

I'm still missing my lady friend pretty badly, but my box of cards from her is keeping me strong. The last card strongly implied that I am a special individual (and not in a mean way).

2007-02-03T22:06:00.000-05:00

February Nights

Here we are are the beginning of February. Groundhog Day has past, and the buorrowing gentleman has declared that there will be an early spring. I tend to regard this as bad news, as I prefer cold weather to warm (and I prefer unconsciousness to hot weather). February is a fine month. Though it's not as large as the others, it still managed to get a couple of well-known days in there, including the aforementioned Groundhog Day and, of course, Saint Valentine's Day.

Side note: Have you ever heard anyone say "ValenTIME's Day"? Don't you just want to mess up their hair and throw away their keys? I do.

Anyway, I'll be away from my lady-friend on Valentine's Day, so I just thought I'd write a little note in advance telling her that I'm proud of her African efforts, though obviously being away from her is worse than a very, very hot day during which someone said "Valentime's Day".

Love that spoon.

TV-wise I am planning to watch Saturday Night Live tonight. The host is Drew Barrymore, who is a bit flighty but at least genuine. She's been a good host in the past, so here's hoping for tonight. More Kenan Thompson would be good. I'm also very excited about "Lost" coming back this week. I think I may have to work during the show, but I'll try to download it afterwards. I'll post a summary afterwards.

2007-02-02T01:03:00.000-05:00

IN LATE WINTER, THE OTTAWA PENGUIN CONSTRUCTS A NEST THAT LOOKS LIKE MICHAEL SCOTT

This is a picture of my television seat, which is located above my chest of drawers and beneath my true blue friend Burgess Meredith. We have good times, Burgess Meredith and I. We enjoy such excellent programs as "The Office" and "The Colbert Report" together. In fact, he's presently perched atop a repeat of "The Office". Fortunately, there were "two" episodes of the show on tonight, and the first was a new episode. A summary will follow:

Phyllis is getting married next week, so Michael is trying to psyche people up for the event with bachelor(ette) parties. Michael's middle-aged frat boy friend Todd Packer insists that the guys' party include a stripper. Michael is hesitant until the Pac-Man suggests that the women get a male stripper for equality's sake. Meanwhile, Karen and Jim's relationship has become a little more difficult. Over the last week, the couple has been having late night talks on the subject of Jim's feelings for Pam. Karen believes (or has convinced herself) that these talks has resolved the issue between them, while Jim seems weary over the lost sleep.
The hiring of strippers is left to Dwight and Jim. Dwight's female stripper proves to be very popular (although her presence is predictably upsetting to Angela), but Michael feels the pains of guilt halfway through a lapdance. The task of hiring a male stripper is left to Jim, who chooses to enlist the help of a Benjamin Franklin historical re-enactor instead. This last plot point had me wondering whether they would adapt this episode for the Canadian version (which I would really like to check out, if only my French was a little better), and if they would have a Parks Canada employee show up as Sir John A MacDonald instead of Mr. Franklin. Anyway. Dwight is 99% sure that this man is not Ben Franklin, therefore sets out to stump him with American Revolution-era trivia (to no success).
It was a good episode, and I'm very glad that the show managed to sustain the fantastic energy and quality of writing that really took off in the second season.

Another show that has caught my eye (and attention) recently is "Aqua Teen Hunger Force". Unfortunately, the show is kind of hard to explain. Essentially it's about Flylock, Master Shake and Meatwad, three anthropomorphic food orders that share a bungalow. Frylock is the mature, scientifically minded one. Master Shake is the irresponsible, foolish con-man and Meatwad is the childlike metamorph who is too-easily swayed by him. Their neighbour, Carl, is a balding, lazy shlub who is constantly having his life (and car) ruined by the trio, largely due to the efforts of Master Shake. The show also supports a wide variety of interesting supporting characters (some of which, the Moonites, appeared recently in Lite-Brite form and sparked fears of a terorrist plot down in the States, but you can read all about that in the news) The show typically has absurd plots, and it's often incredibly offensive, but it's always engaging.

I'm resisting the urge to get a haircut... But perhaps, instead, that instinct is one I should follow. We'll see what happens tomorrow (later today, technically...)

Domville out!

2007-02-01T01:23:00.000-05:00

Catan Lacks the Infrastructure to Sustain Itself

The task at hand is "updating". I have a lady friend, let us call her "Spoon", who I suspect will actually bother to read this. This is because she, for a reason I am not quite certain, "cares" for me. Moreover, and perhaps more shockingly, she actually "wuvs" me. Thus, largely for her benefit, I will be updating this blog as frequently as possible for the duration of her absence. And while it might seem that a social butterfly such as myself would have very little free time, the actual truth of the matter might just surprise you (hint: I have started using the phrase "my shows" with regard to television programs that I watch daily, some of the titles will be revealed later).

Unfortunately, as the amount of content increases, the quality of content will surely diminish. I realized earlier today that the reason my updates were infrequent is that in previous months, I actually considered whether readers would find my material relevant and interesting.

No longer.

From now on, we are serving Matthew's opinions, observations and vague attempts at wit. Be warned: I will not be bothered to spellcheck. Moving on.

Daniel Radcliffe is coming under fire from some parents for taking a role in a production of "Equus". Apparently they're taking issue with the play's sexual content and are worried that it comes in conflict with Radcliffe's established role as "Harry Potter" in the eponymous films. Most annoyingly, ABC news called it a "new play" rather than a "new production" (but that will be my whiny theatre complaint for 2007). Personally, I'm happy for Radcliffe. Apparently he's done quite a bit of stage work, so I'm glad that the Harry Potter thing is opening further doors for him. "Equus" is also one of my favourites, so I hope the show works out.

Back to "24". I finished Season Three, and I found the conclusion very satisfying. Good suspense, excellent acting (particularly from Gina Torres, a perennial favourite of mine) and a fine resolution. I may rent Season Four, but I may hold off for the return of my Dark Continent-bound paramour.

I have found myself staying up later and later, which is not really by choice. I keep getting distracted by the incredibly-addictive "Settlers of Catan" java game. Sometimes I wish the actual board game let me just hit "Quit" when things take a real turn for the worst. And those artificial players are "vengeful". They know how to kick you when you're down. They'll rip a brick card out of your hand, even though you just traded four sheep to get it. It's heartbreaking enough to induce me to swear at them in the chat window, even though I'm aware that they cannot understand my rantings, nor respond.

I'll turn to the subject of "my shows" on tomorrow's post.

2007-01-30T23:27:00.001-05:00

HARUMPH!

So, here's a new post for all the fine readers, of which I am fully aware there are none.
Much has transpired since my last post in September.

On a professional level, here's what's cooking:
-I do Eddie May Murder Mysteries every now and then
-Parks Canada still has be do a little Colonel By for social functions
-I stock a shelf or two at Shopper's Drug Mart.
A conflict between the first two on the list actually had me refusing paid acting work for paid acting work (which is likely the last time I'll face such a problem).

I will address these positions in the order in which I listed them:

Eddie May: Not too shabby a position. I dabbled with these guys last Christmastime, doing a "The Apprentice" parody. I played an executive backstabbing type. Now, in 2007, I return to the role, and I'm pretty content. The main reason for this contentedness is food. I often get to partake in the snakables offered to the audience, and that... that makes all the difference.
Parks Canada: To publicize the coming 175th anniversary of the Rideau Canal, some of the Maple Sugar Gang members do a little razzle-dazzle every now and then. I got to wear a very respectable hat at the last one, and I got to yell at Matt Miwa in front of the Mayor of Ottawa (which is always a plus).
Shopper's Drug Mart: I put things on shelves... repeatedly. And thus am humbled.

What fun! Anyway, on a personal level, I'm dealing with the absence of my significant other. She is one of those special souls that finds comfort and strength in helping others. And not just in the "give a hobo a quarter" sense, but in the "I'll sacrifice a huge amount of time, comfort and money to ensure that the less fortunate are slightly less so." She's awesome, but I'm sad that I won't see her for a long while.

I'm running a weekly Dungeons and Dragons game. It's a nifty group and the players seem to be enjoying it.

"G-Men Defectives" is coming back... to a theatre near you... assuming you live in New York City. That's right; Ray and I are taking Garfield and Marmaduke across the border. I'll post some more information as it becomes available.

I recently got into "24" and am enjoying it quite a bit. I like shows where the characters aren't incredibly stupid (and the suspension of disbelief factor is fairly low). I'm nearing the end of Season 3, and the contrivances are fairly minimal. I really enjoy Jack Bauer. While he has a lot of the stereotypical male protagonist characteristics, he also has a complicated morality. The whole "can you do an evil thing for a good goal" issue is really engaging. Equally awesome is Senator/President David Palmer. Very interesting character, very strong actor.
Not so much Kim Bauer and her suspiciously-hasty promotion from nanny to Counter-Terrorist expert. I firmly believe this is an acting issue. Kim had some poor luck in Season 2 (she met seven or eight strangers over the course of the day, about six of them turned out to be insane). This Cuthbert woman is irritating and unable to portray confidence. The Chloe character is just as annoying, but I think it's intentional in her case. Niftily, Daniel Dae Kim from "Lost" is on the show, playing "Agent Tom Baker" (a weird geeky trifecta on that one). I'm a big fan of Penny Johnson Jerald's character (Sherry Palmer) her flawless pragmatism. She's perfectly practical evil, and I love that.

2006-09-26T12:26:00.000-04:00

Now THAT'S a gap!

Sorry about not updating in a while. I've been busy with a few things. Here's a list:

1) "The Parks Canada Players", as lead by John "Mugsy" Muggleton. We had a great time performing historical plays, but unfortunately the summer is over. Ah well. Matt "Masterblaster" Miwa and I are doing a little preview for top Parks Canada brass in November, so that'll be a mini-reunion.
2) Movin'. I am now living farther east than I used to, and I have a new roommate who is not related to me by blood.
3) Actin'. I recently appeared in Vision Theatre's production of Christopher Durang's "Miss Witherspoon", directed by John Koensgen (with Teri Rata Loretto, Colleen Sutton, Nadine Thornhill and Sarah Hearn). Awesome director, nifty script, tres-cool actors and a damn fine theatre company. I had a great time (and I got to dress as Gandalf for reasons other than my own amusement).
4) Employment Seekin'. I need full-time work and am tirelessly searching for it.
5) World's Largest Dungeonin'. I'm part of a group of gamers that decided to tackle AEG's Dungeons and Dragons adventure "The World's Largest Dungeon". I'm excited about it.

That's mostly it...
Matthew

2006-06-28T10:36:00.000-04:00

Fine Fringe

Alrighty. The Fringe is over and I hereby declare it a success!

"The Parrot Monologues" gathered larger and larger audiences as the Fringe continued (and I feel the comedy increased in quality with each performance). Fine work by the cast and crew! I got to keep the titular parrot, and he's hanging out in my room as we speak.

"G-Men Defectives" worked out very nicely. Ray and I received some tasty reviews, and were had some extremely enthusiastic audiences. The chances of touring next year are increasing.

Also, thanks to everyone who voted for either show for "Best in Venue". Your support is much appreciated.

2006-06-17T21:36:00.000-04:00

BECAUSE JUST ONE SHOW IS FOR WUSSIES

Can you smell the Fringe? I thought you could...

"The Parrot Monologues" is tres funny. We had an awesome opening and a equally awesome follow-up today. There's a show tomorrow (Sunday, the 18th of June 2006) at 7PM (which will probably be long over by the time you read this). Parrots, miracles, urchins... all the good stuff.

Afterwards, check out "G-Men Defectives" featuring myself and Ray Besharah (we co-wrote and co-directed it, fo' sho'). The show is very exciting, especially if you want to help hunt down COMMIES! Not Communists, mind you, but COMMIES! Garfield and Marmaduke will explain it to you when you show up. Bring a bag lunch.

Also awesome: "Can't get Started" starring Colin "Budd" Munch and Alex "The Bees" Paxton-Beesley. Don't forget my favourite little Englishman at the Fringe, Stuart Matthews in "Zombies". Cooler than cool Pat "The Goat" Gauthier and Natalie "Joy" Quesnel are also doin' "The Man Who Went to Work One Day and got Eaten by a Bear". If I have to tell you why you should see that one, you obviously didn't properly read the title. As my demi-god Walken teaches: BEAR SUITS ARE FUNNY!

Check out schedules here.

2006-05-28T10:59:00.000-04:00

Fringe Along With Me

Hola.
"The Parrot Monologues" has set sail towards hilarity. Amanda, Vanessa, Jessica and Owen are acting their little butts off and Sophie is directing them towards glory and riches (while Jane stage manages them away from any unseasonal icebergs).
Yarr!

"G-Men Defectives" is also coming along quite well. We have a stage manager, Michael Showler (with whom I recently worked on "Criminal Genius") and we have a slot in the upcoming Meet and Greet for Fringe performers on the 29th. Ray Besharah and I are going to be performing a five minute exclusive scene at this event, so check it out if you're involved with the Fringe.

2006-05-07T13:14:00.000-04:00

First, a plug:
"Three in the Back, Two in the Head" is happening May 10th-13th at 6:30PM at the Studio Leonard-Beaulne (That's in the lower floor of the Theatre Building, 135 Seraphin Marion, I think).
Admission is Pay What You Can, so we welcome hobos and millionaires alike, or hobos that are secretly millionairs, or millionaires that are secretly hobos. I think the latter group is the least likely.

Second, an announcement:
The script for "The Parrot Monologues" is finished and our director, Sophie, seems pleased with it. Always a good sign. DOUBLE ANNOUNCEMENT! Our Mystery Male Guest Star is...
Owen Spendlove. We're thrilled to have him on the team.

Third, just some Matthew-ness:
I've started working for Parks Canada. I'm doing some historical plays for them (playing Colonel By and some other historical figures). So far, it's pretty fun. John Muggleton is writing/directing the shows, and he's very easy to get along with. We have formed a group of operatives known as The Maple Sugar Gang, but I can't tell you anything beyond that because it's classified.

2006-04-27T23:12:00.000-04:00

MMMMM FRINGELICIOUS!

Alrighty. I just noticed that the Ottawa Fringe site has linked to this blog, in connection with Percolator Productions's (which I contend is gramatically correct) "The Parrot Monologues".

The show now features Vanessa Broze, Jessica Charbonneau, Amanda Klaman and a Very Special Male Guest Star. The show is written by me (Matthew Domville) and directed by directing-supahstah Sophie Tilgner (writer/director of last year's "Stale Pizza, 2AM and No Conclusion", director of year before's "Indulgence", etc).

I can't give away too much about the story, but it's about pirates. This is a fortunate topic, it seems, because I understand that the theme of this year's Fringe is "X marks the Fringe".

Also, it's a comedy, even shtickier than last year's "How to Save the Day".

The Venue and the Times will be announced here, as well as the Very Special Male Guest Star.

2006-04-26T13:03:00.000-04:00

Did you miss me, blog? No? Damn your cold heart.

Anyhoo, I'm finished my degree, a fact that fills me with joy and cautious optimism. Now, I can finally put little pretentious letters after my name (hoorah!).

What's happening with Domville, you ask? First off: "Three in the Back, Two in the Head" is coming up... All-Star Cast: Owen "Crazyface" Spendlove, Scott "Scotty Boy" Goldman, Karl "Angry Man" Czarny, Sophie "Script'll-Be-Done-Soon-I-Promise" Tilgner, and me Matthew "Jetpack" Domville. Stage Managed by Adam "Burger" King. Directed by Cassandra "No Nickname" Silver. Second week of May, the Studio. Details (and maybe even a poster) soon.

Speaking of which (or rather, alluding to which), "The Parrot Monologues" is looking very strong. We'll be announcing a full cast soon, as well as show times.

Interesting note: Industrial Images (whom a love for their generous support during "How to Save the Day") can print up temporary tattoos for your show. Isn't that neat? I think it's neat.

2006-02-01T23:48:00.000-05:00

Aha... Time to plug, methinks.

Here's the hell-of-a-good-show I'm in that's running on February 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 9th, 10th and 11th at 8PM over at the Alumni Theatre.

It's called "Zastrozzi: Master of Discipline". It's written by George F. Walker and it's directed by David Whiteley.

There's fights, melodrama, painting, whipping, chicken, parasols, and maybe even a crack of thunder or two.

I think you'd like it. I'm the guy with the axe.

2006-01-18T15:49:00.000-05:00

I've returned to school and am slowly getting into the ga-roove. Speech and Movement are proving especially interesting so far, but Theatre in its Social Context has possibilities.

Zastrozzi rehearsals are truckin' along. We've gotten to the fights and I think mine should be pretty intense. I'm trying to hold/use as many different weapons as possible in the play. So far, we've got: rapier, longsword and whip. At tonight's rehearsal, I'll ask if I can be holding a handaxe during the Prologue. I'm also trying to work a dagger in there (maybe in combination with turkey-eating).

This is all really just a testament to my shoddy, prop-based method of performance... Props and schtick... That's what I'm all about.

Speaking of schtick... "The Parrot Monologues" is moving along nicely. I have confirmation from all of the actors. Woot! The script itself should be ready for a read-through in March, but I'll post updates here.

2005-12-29T16:47:00.000-05:00

This holiday season has been one of veggin' and chillin'. I was expecting to be working a bit on the Fringe play, but I discovered that sleeping can sometimes be more enjoyable than writing. I spent a little while testing this discovery, just to make sure that my results were correct.

My holiday haul included a new phone, some tasty DVDs, books and some high-quality sheets. Not too shabby. People were pleased with my gifts, which is always nice. I also got to see my grandmother for a while, which is even nicer.

2005-12-18T21:39:00.000-05:00

Back from Montreal

Some good news for everyone: "The Parrot Monologues" was selected to be a part of the tenth annual Ottawa Fringe Festival. Assuming nothing goes awry, the play will feature the direction of Ms. Sophie Tilgner and the acting talents of Ms. Katie Bunting, Ms. Amanda Klaman and Ms. Vanessa Broze. Rogues and scholars all.

I just got back from Montreal, where I hanged out with my dad and bro. Along the way I picked up some tasty geefts for loved ones. I also got a chance to watch "King Kong", which I really enjoyed. Very exciting flick.

2005-12-11T02:45:00.000-05:00

WINTER VACATION!

I think that deserves a "woot".

This month, I'm mainly working and rehearsing, but my schedule is considerably more free than September to November.

I spent today watching "Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, et cetera... et cetera". I can't say I really enjoyed it overall, but it certainly had some fun elements. The good stuff included Mr. Tumnus, the Beavers and the White Witch's crown. The bad stuff included the score (New Age warbling shit), the pacing and Jim Broadbent's continued use of Facial Hair Acting. That goof stole Gandalf's Oscar... grrrr....

That should be it for me...

Matthew

2005-12-08T12:15:00.000-05:00

Two Exams Down... A-Varying-Amount-Depending-if-the-Person-Asking-is-Trying-to-Get-me -to-do-a-Work-Shift-or-Not to Go

I wrote my English essay today. I showed up early with a hot dog combo from the Snack Shack, using those last precious minutes to cram bits of data into my short-term memory (and bits of fried potatoes into my short-term mouth). I spoke with a couple of ladies about our professor's policies regarding marking. Apparently she doesn't "give" perfect scores. A completely correct response results in a 7.5 out of 10. What's more, this theory is thought to be common in the English department. I really wish the English department was down the hall from the Math department, that way this kind of thing wouldn't happen.

Let's consider an example:

I ask my friend Snaggletooth Ruth for help because I'm moving. I need her to assist me in moving furniture. She shows up, she moves the furniture, nothing gets broken, we split a pizza.
Good times. I say Ruth gets a ten out of ten. If Ruth didn't show up, I'd give her a zero. If she showed up, but faked a back injury, that's probably worth a three out of ten (generous, perhaps). If she showed up, moved the armoire, then took a three hour nap on my bed as I moved it, that's a five (that armoire's heavy so it's worth extra). If she moved the furniture but broke my seashell collection, even though I specifically warned her that it was fragile, that would get her a 7 or so. But full moving equals a ten.

Except, it seems, in English Department Land (which, as previously stated, shares no common border with Math Departmentania). In order to pry a ten from the cluches of this bitter nation, Snaggletooth Ruth would have to show up early, make me breakfast, massage my feet, feed my cats, haul all my birc-a-brac at once on her back without forgetting to wipe her shoes before she entered my new place... All while simultaneously defining "Country House Poetry" using examples.

(Do I smell a bridge burning...? Mmmmm... mesquite... Maybe I should've waited for my mark before sassin' da prof...)

Anyway, next was my Modern Acting exam. I performed a scene from "Antigone" and I felt it went rather well. I'm trying to cut back on the schmackting, and I thought it was pretty schmack-free.

I also found out that a Murder Mystery I'm doing soon is happening during a private party at the NAC. (Which provides the means for me to sneakily boast that I've performed at the NAC)

Damn... You know what this post needs? Brackets.

(There we go...)

2005-12-06T02:05:00.000-05:00

Sleepy... So... Sleepy... BUT FIRST!...

I just got back from an evening shift over at the drugstore. I was scheduled to work until 1AM, but someone cleverly scratched out the "1" and replaced it with a "2", hoping that I hadn't checked it previously. I had, of course, so this desperate bid to scam an extra hour out of me amused me greatly.

The job is a simple one. Product comes in on skids, I help unload it, then stock it on the shelves. Sometimes I get to put theft-preventing stickers on the merchandise, but that's a thrill reserved for special occasions.

The breakroom contained "Double Stuff Oreos" on this particular evening, which is always a good thing.

I spent a little time realizing that my class schedule is desperately screwing over the proposed rehearsal schedule for "Zastrozzi" and trying to figure out a way around it. If anyone knows a tasty Winter course at U of O, drop me a line. I have a few I'm excited about, including "Diction" and "Movement", and I've got one with a very energetic Prof. that I haven't had since First Year.

OK. For reals, I is sleepy. Tomorrow is a day of English catch-up in preparation for my exam on Wednesday (and possibly a brief-but-essential cameo by a certain individual if I play my cards right).

Matthew

2005-12-05T00:32:00.000-05:00

With a wave of my hand... the blog begins!

2005-12-04T23:39:00.000-05:00

It begins after a "Zastrozzi" rehearsal. A cold, scruffy young man (eager to munch the Chicken Peanut Curry that was made by his mother) sits down on his incredibly un-orthopedic chair and searches for a way to magnify his miniscule fame. Ego-swelling, he discovers an easy way to become a "blogger". An unfortunately dim star is born!

The main focus of this narcisistic effort is I, Matthew Domville, a tough-talking cop who plays by my own rules. And by "cop", I mean "student".

I study Theatre at the U of O. University of Ottawa for those of you not in the know. Others call it "Ottawa U", but this is clearly wrong. The advertisements on the bus tell me I "benefit from generous scholarships", so the cheque must be in the mail.

No sense getting sassy from the get-go. I'm learning to become an actor, but that doesn't really pay the bills, so I have some part-time jobs. I do tours for the Haunted Walk of Ottawa and I stock shelves at a drugstore. I've also recently started doing murder mysteries for Eddie May Mysteries, but this may be a very temporary job, as the holidays are their busiest time of year.

I act whenever directors are kind enough to cast me. My most recent work was in Natalie Joy Quesnel's production of George F Walker's "Criminal Genius", where I played Rolly Moore. I was a big fan of this experience, largely due to the fun people that were involved with the show. I also used it as a test-run for some of the practical theories I had been taught in my Modern Acting class this semester.

Next, I've got David Whitely's direction of "Zastrozzi: Master of Discipline", also by Walker. I'm playing Bernardo in that one, a nasty little assassasin in this tale of revenge.

Later (hopefully), I'll get to be in Ray Besharah's "G-Men Defective", a two-man show he wrote for us in the Fringe. I hope that it gets selected in the Fringe lottery.

I also write plays sometimes. They tend to be shtick-laden and less-than-entirely-serious. This year, I wrote and directed "How to Save the Day" for Sock 'N Buskin, a one-act about heroes. It had some sold-out houses, but I largely attribute that to the ridiculously awesome cast and stage manager. Also this year, I contributed to "nigh" for 8-0-8 Productions in Calgary. The show combined six scenes about the afterlife, all dealing with a recently-dead person and the man at the "gates". Mine was a typically-comedic scene called "Point System". For Fringe 2006, I've submitted a play called "The Parrot Monologues". It's a story about a the most attractive captain in the world, the dirtiest street urchin in the world, the most virtuous fiance in the world and the parrot with the longest mustache in the world.

We'll see how that turns out.

I also role-play ("Dungeons and Dragons" and such, nothing therapeutic or sexual), when I've go the time. I'm in a couple of bi-weekly Friday games, but my attendance wanes as acting and work priorities take over.

Anyhoo... That's a bit of me. See if any of that interests you.

Matthew